My Running Gear

The air temp was 25, and wind chill was 7.

First, a snow picture, which does not show the 22mph NNW wind:

Here's what I had on this morning as I ran my 4 miler:

Garmin 305 Forerunner with heart-rate monitor:


Nike Pro Insulated Base Layer Tights:

Starter Polyester Shorts (from Wal-Mart):

Nike Pro Insulated Base Layer Top:

Tek Gear Technical Polyester Shirt (also from Wal-Mart)

Flashing LED Light on armband

Old Navy Hat (.50 on their clearance rack):

Nike Gloves:

Wellco Desert Tan V-Trax Combat Boot (these could be the weapon of choice over the next few days of snow and ice):

Cotton Gold-Toe socks (I know...cotton is a no-no):


I usually wear these, Asics GT-2140's (these are about worn out, I have a new pair of Nike's on the way):


You can check out my run here. As I ran north from Daleview Dr to 1st Ave on 22nd St, I was in a 22mph headwind (a little less than 3/4 of a mile). Most of that I ran with my eyes closed because of the snow and ice in my face (my right eyeball is still aching), and a left cheek covered in ice. From 2.59 to 3.03 was the same (another 1/2 mile). From 3.03 to 3.67, I had an ice-covered right cheek, some of which you can see here:

The beard is staying through winter.

Weather notwithstanding, it was an amazing run, my pace was way slow, but I am pleased with it.

On hating God and receiving mercy

Picking up where we left off...God comes against Israel for her sins. He tells her what He's going to do them in Micah 6; Micah 7 begins with how sucky it is to have God against her: people cannot be trusted...no one. Sons against fathers, daughters-in law against mothers-in law, "a man's enemies within his own household". I immediately thought of Derek Webb's "A King and a Kingdom":

"But nothing unifies like a common enemy

and we’ve got one, sure as hell.

He may be living in your house,

he may be raising up your kid,
s
he may be sleeping with your wife
.
Oh no, he may not look like you think"

And then...in verse 7, the sun begins to rise. Despite the sins, despite the hatred toward God...something happens.

"But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me."

Micah tells the enemies of God's people not to take too much joy in Israel's downfall. Why? Because God's people are simply being punished for her sin. Despite this fact, despite the darkness, despite their hatred of, for and towards God, the LORD is their light. Because they know that they deserve this wrath, they bear it, but only for a time, only until the LORD "pleads their case" and establishes them in HIS righteousness. And, people, the enemies of God's people will simply not know how to respond. They will be dumbfounded, enable to speak or to hear. They will fear God, not merely for His judgment and power, but because He can forgive sins, because He shows mercy and destroys our sins and separation.

Over the past few months, I've really been struggling with the concept of grace. I think at the root of this struggle is a hatred towards God. I'm not sure what to do with that...do I REALLY hate God? What does that even mean? What else explains my bent toward sin? Is is just the unredeemed and unregenerate parts of me being filtered out? Perhaps a "better" question is, "Do I REALLY love God?". Recently I was asked how I can rectify my hatred toward God and my continued hope in Him? Simple.

Micah 7:8b-9: "though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit int he darkness, the LORD will be my light. Because I have sinned against him, I will bear my LORD's wrath, until he pleads my case and establishes my right. He will bring me out into the light; I will see his righteousness."

Why do I hate God?

Psalm 130:3-4- "If you, O LORD, kept a record of sins, O LORD, who could stand? But with you there is forgiveness; therefore you are feared."

Micah 7:17c-19- "They will turn in fear to the LORD our God and will be afraid of you. Who is a God like you, who pardons sins and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea."

I am God's enemy because of His power, His power to be kind and merciful. His power to forgive. His power to love in a way that I can neither fathom nor express.

God is judge, jury, prosecutor and executor. He is also Defender. And I, despite my constant rebellion against the very one who saves me, am righteous because of Him.

Because if this is not true...we are doomed beyond belief.

It's been a while

I'm continuing my read through the minor prophets. In Micah 6, God makes his case against his people. He acts as prosecutor, jury, judge and even executioner. My western sentiment is quick to cry "foul", but then I remember that He alone is God. If what is written in the Bible is indeed true, He makes the rules, and should I want to be in a relationship with Him, I need to submit.

He delivered me from a slavery to sin.
He has brought me on an amazing journey.
All of this was for me to see His righteousness, His love for me, undeserved, I might add. Why?
My violent bent, my lying and deceitful tongue. My lack of justice, mercy and humility.
While I wait for Him, for the Hope song,
I am eating without being filled, planting but not harvesting, storing up treasures on earth, and following observations and practices of the wicked all around me.

But...He is also our defense.

"When all seems lost
When we're thrown and we're tossed
We remember the cost
We rest in Him
Shadow of the cross"

-Shadows, David Crowder*Band

The Hope Song

Cover your eyes, little ones...

Ok. I cannot find the link. A few weeks ago, a blogger commented on seeing Derek Webb in concert and wrote that Derek ended the show with the song, "American Flag Umbrella". The song includes the following line:

"In the end it will all be ok
That's what the wise men tell us
So if it's not ok then it's not the end, oh my friends
There's hope for everyone".

The blogger called it, "The Hope Song". This is an interesting concept, one I've thought about before. David Bazan (and Pedro the Lion) has used this throughout his career.

On 2000's "Winners Never Quit", Bazan takes us through hell, in graphic detail:

• selfishness of faith, looking out for self
• extra-marital sex
• alcohol abuse
• murder of a spouse to prevent deceit from being revealed
• the justification of sin
• the justification of the means for an end
• personal success being equated with God's happiness
• and then, the hope song, called "Winners Never Quit" which ends with:
  

"Count it a blessing
That you're such a failure
Your second chance might
Never have come"

On 2002's "Control", we find similar themes:

• the hopelessness of divorce
• the emptiness of materialism
• the meaninglessness of extra-marital sex
  
• deceit, lies, murder of a cheating spouse, the questioning of faith
• And then...the hope song, fittingly called, "Rejoice"

"Wouldn't it be so wonderful
if everything were meaningless
But everything is so meaningful
And most everything turns to shit
Rejoice"

Bazan also did this in concert; both times I saw him twice in 2004, he ended with the song, "Secret of the Easy Yoke". Here's the closing chorus from the Omaha show:

"If this is only a test
I hope that i'm passing
cause I'm losing steam
and I still want to trust you

peace be still

and in a moment, I'm alive again
and now I want it all the time
and in a moment, I'm alive again
and now I want it all the time"

The hope song is key to us as believers.

What is your hope in?

"Countdown..."

Over at B-Mac's place, he's doing a countdown to the release of his new book, A New Kind of Christianity.

Here's today's gem:

"People would visit the church for a few weeks or months, listen intently, and then come to see me with their questions … I would give them my best answers, but often, after they left, I felt hollow. If they “bought” my answers, I was strangely disappointed. If they pushed back and told me my answers still made no sense to them, I though, “Good for you, because some of them don’t really make that much sense to me either.” (6)"

Perhaps...and I'm just sayin', he could have used the Bible, rather than his "best answers".

And to think that this guy sells books.